1. I will start with the most important life-lesson that I have learnt this month: how to play the cups. I am sure that this is a skill which will serve me well in life and, if I wasn't enough of a fidget before, I well and truly am one now when in the same vicinity as a plastic beaker. 2a. To expand upon ''lesson 1'' of November, the voice of Benjamin Blümchen/ Chuck Norris is also that of the big, evil white orc in ''Der kleine Hobbit''. My childhood dreams of friendly, talking elephants are being shattered one voice at a time. Germany, I love you lots, but please don't do this to me.
2b. Also, after hearing ''Haribo macht Kinder fett, und Erwachsene merken's net. Sterben muss man sowieso, schneller geht's mit Haribo'', I will never look at ''Gummibärchen'' in just quite the same way again.
3a. Cons of ''Der kleine Hobbit'':
- Spiders. Lots of them. In 3D. For what seems like a very long while
- When watched in German, although the dragon voice is very, well, dragon-y, it isn't quite Benedict Cumberbatch
- Orlando Bloom
- Funny ginger dwarf (as a fellow red-head, I'm allowed to say that)
- Peter Jackson's directing
- In fact, the film in general. Go, watch
5. In Germany, land of ''Vorsprung durch Technik'' and all that, it is possible to buy biscuit-scented toilet roll. I repeat, BISCUIT-SCENTED TOILET ROLL. No, I don't know why either. 6. There are a lot of film versions of ''Der Nussknacker''. After [surprisingly, unintentionally] watching four of these in the course of one evening (Barbie, Micky Mouse, Tom & Jerry and Tim Burton's version (don't judge me)), it's safe to say that the "Tanz der Zuckerfee" was with me for several days afterwards.
7. Nutella can be bought in 5kg jars.
8. Have hope, high streets of Britain; somewhere, in a land far, far away (aka Limburg), ''Woolworths'' still exists.
9. Germans are tall. After having spent the past 5 months debating as to whether I am just very short, Wikipedia has informed me that Germans are, on average, 1 inch taller than their British counterparts. I am taking this as a perfectly reliable excuse for my being constantly mistaken for a 13 year old.
10. It is possible to day-trip to France from Germany. This is a concept that I found particularly exciting as the most tropical option from home is normally, well, Scotland, which isn't exactly another country. Yet.
11. French (or, moreover, my lack of it) is just as scary now as it was at GCSE. After entering a particularly snazzy French chocolate shop (''apropos'', chocolate shop= the very fun to say ''Schokoladenladen'' ''auf Deutsch''), my response to being offered free chocolate (in French, obvs) was to shake my head and swiftly exit said shop. Not only did I refuse free food, but it was chocolate!
12. Strasbourg Christmas Market. Do. It.
13a. GEMA block a lot of YouTube videos.
13b. I do, however, miss BBC iPlayer more than unlimited YouTube access. And the odd bit of 40D's weird-and-wonderfulness.
14. Birthdays are kind of a big deal. Take this from someone who had 4 cakes.
14. Birthdays are kind of a big deal. Take this from someone who had 4 cakes.
15. Having a birthday which falls in the same week as "Nikolaus" is super, super exciting. I can, however, think of things which are better for the waistline.
16a. "The Voice of Germany" is far more "spannend" than the British version; I am talking live-internet-feedback straight after the performance, followed by the judges feedback, followed by the public vote. (See "lesson 29" of November re Germans doing "Rückmeldung" very well).
16b. My inner mathematician is, however, a tad confuzzled as to how it is mathematically possible to receive 120% of the vote.
17. I have found the German word which, like the English "like" can, like be used in, like, any context. And I can already, like, tell, like just how much this has like increased my like language skills. Or not. Sorry, German speaking world, "es war halt so".
18a. Christmas Crackers are a British thing. I am now seriously considering a back-up-career as a Christmas-Cracker-exporter-to-the-world-er. The world seriously needs more Christmas Crackers in it. You can never have too many Christmas Crackers. Ever. 18b. Ditto ''O Little Town of Bethlehem'' being relatively unknown. Much to my disappointment on Christmas Day, when the poor Church organist was seemingly only accompanied by yours truly. Who may or may not have been singing in the wrong language...
19. Brits clap to show appreciation, Germans knock on tables.
20. When using the word ''Applaus'', there are two possibilities:
a. You will get ''Applaus, Applaus für deine Worte'' sung back at you
b. You will have Sportfreunde Stiller's song as an ''Ohrwurm'' for the rest of the day
21. After returning to England for New Year, I have learnt that there is a place where Adel Tawil's song, ''Lieder'', is not repeated every five minutes on the radio. This saddens me slightly, so I've taken the opportunity to download it and learn the words so I can full-on-karaoke-it in the car when I get back.
22. I am old. The generation younger than me is not aware of the ''Spice Girls''. Or ''S Club 7''. Meaning that both my story of seeing ''Bradley'' whilst in a restaurant last year and my hidden-talent of [still] knowing all of the dance-moves to ''Reach'' are meaningless and irrelevant. It's a harsh reality, but I'll have to try to accept it and move on. I saw ''H'' from ''Steps'' at the pantomime a few years ago. ''Steps'', anyone? No? Ok. I'll stop now. And cry in a corner.
23. Germans do Christmas/ New Year greetings properly. Whilst the most that I normally have to offer is ''have a merry Christmas and a happy New Year'', the Germans don't appear to stop at ''frohe Weihnachten und einen guten Rutsch'', but rather they wish a whole number of things in addition: health, happiness, no stress, success etc., etc. This is VERY nice. England, ditch the generic sentence and get on it.
24. I underestimated how much I love cheddar cheese and arrived back in England craving nothing more than a good ol' cheese salad in the form of a Tesco meal-deal.
25. Highlight of flawed chat-up lines used on me whilst in Germany: '
30. Despite umming and arring last year as to whether to actually apply to do a teaching assistantship, I am absolutely loving, loving, loving it, and am SO chuffed that my contract has been extended.
Haribo macht Kinder fett, und Erwachsene merken's net. Sterben muss man sowieso, schneller geht's mit Haribo- Haribo makes children fat and adults don't notice it. You've got to die anyway; it's faster with Haribo.
Gummibärchen- Gummy bears
Der kleine Hobbit- The Hobbit
Vorsprung durch Technik- advancement through technology (Audi slogan)
Der Nussknacker- The Nutcracker
Tanz der Zuckerfee- The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy
Nikolaus- 6th December; children get presents (similar to Santa Claus)
spannend- exciting
Rückmeldung- feedback
es war halt so- it was just so
Applaus, Applaus für deine Worte- applause, applause for your words (song lyrics)
Ohrwurm- the noun referring to having a song stuck in your head
Lieder- songs
frohe Weihnachten und einen guten Rutsch- (loosely translated) merry Christmas and a happy New Year
20. When using the word ''Applaus'', there are two possibilities:
a. You will get ''Applaus, Applaus für deine Worte'' sung back at you
b. You will have Sportfreunde Stiller's song as an ''Ohrwurm'' for the rest of the day
21. After returning to England for New Year, I have learnt that there is a place where Adel Tawil's song, ''Lieder'', is not repeated every five minutes on the radio. This saddens me slightly, so I've taken the opportunity to download it and learn the words so I can full-on-karaoke-it in the car when I get back.
22. I am old. The generation younger than me is not aware of the ''Spice Girls''. Or ''S Club 7''. Meaning that both my story of seeing ''Bradley'' whilst in a restaurant last year and my hidden-talent of [still] knowing all of the dance-moves to ''Reach'' are meaningless and irrelevant. It's a harsh reality, but I'll have to try to accept it and move on. I saw ''H'' from ''Steps'' at the pantomime a few years ago. ''Steps'', anyone? No? Ok. I'll stop now. And cry in a corner.
23. Germans do Christmas/ New Year greetings properly. Whilst the most that I normally have to offer is ''have a merry Christmas and a happy New Year'', the Germans don't appear to stop at ''frohe Weihnachten und einen guten Rutsch'', but rather they wish a whole number of things in addition: health, happiness, no stress, success etc., etc. This is VERY nice. England, ditch the generic sentence and get on it.
24. I underestimated how much I love cheddar cheese and arrived back in England craving nothing more than a good ol' cheese salad in the form of a Tesco meal-deal. 25. Highlight of flawed chat-up lines used on me whilst in Germany: '
'it has always been my dream to know a teacher''
- a man in a fairly respectable job, who clearly hadn't cottoned on to my being a language assistant, but who had, I assume, at some point, actually been to school and most probably know a teacher.
26. After having spent the majority of December getting particularly well acquainted with various strains of the common cold, I feel quite excited to currently have regained use of both my normal voice and my nostrils.
27. I speak considerably lower when I speak in German.
28. Hair cuts are wonderful things. After a few months of spending most of my badminton playing time with my ponytail in my face, but not quite having full faith in myself to get it cut in Germany in case I made a mistake and ended up with no hair or something equally as drastic, I have had it chopped and am back to enjoying unimpaired badminton vision.
29a. Hula-hooping is strenuous stuff and my hips are still bruised.
29b. Center Parcs rapids are just as exciting at age 21 as they were at age 5.
30. Despite umming and arring last year as to whether to actually apply to do a teaching assistantship, I am absolutely loving, loving, loving it, and am SO chuffed that my contract has been extended.
Haribo macht Kinder fett, und Erwachsene merken's net. Sterben muss man sowieso, schneller geht's mit Haribo- Haribo makes children fat and adults don't notice it. You've got to die anyway; it's faster with Haribo.
Gummibärchen- Gummy bears
Der kleine Hobbit- The Hobbit
Vorsprung durch Technik- advancement through technology (Audi slogan)
Der Nussknacker- The Nutcracker
Tanz der Zuckerfee- The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy
Nikolaus- 6th December; children get presents (similar to Santa Claus)
spannend- exciting
Rückmeldung- feedback
es war halt so- it was just so
Applaus, Applaus für deine Worte- applause, applause for your words (song lyrics)
Ohrwurm- the noun referring to having a song stuck in your head
Lieder- songs
frohe Weihnachten und einen guten Rutsch- (loosely translated) merry Christmas and a happy New Year
